Before you can be confident or tell who’s confident, you need to understand what confidence is and where it comes from. What makes you consider a man confident? His look or acts? Do you know that a wealthy man could be less confident than a homeless man on a stolen sandals?
Beyond fame and wealth, there exists the precious quality ‘confidence.’ The elusive quality is quiet, calm, move in grace, and does not improve its image by seeking attention.
Do you go along with thoughtful definitions below, made by some commentators on what makes a man confident? (Note: not professional views)
A confident man is the man who can make decisions and stand by them. A lot of times he has to make decisions for others that do not have the confidence to make hard decisions themselves, says John Xenos, a quora contributor.
He also wrote about stability: A confident man has stability in principles, making others to count on him.
According to Daniel Andrew Lockwood, Author of self-help and recovery issues:
Confidence is about moving through life proactively. Confidence is quick to complement and willing to help, which means it’s actions are mostly trusting and cooperative.
It needs no recognition from others and cares not for trophies, Andrew added.
He also shared the following bullet points on his blog:
A confident person:
- is quick to admit fault. This removes the temptation to blame.
- is quick to admit defeat. This creates partners instead of rivals.
- is quick to offer praise, be hesitant to express dissatisfaction.
- shines a light on the past to sell the future. Because, nothing beats a track record.
- does not hesitate to ask for both help and criticism from those who are better than him.
Being happy with Oneself.
Confidence sets in, when a man genuinely accept himself and is happy with his own image.
the best way to achieve confidence is being happy with yourself and then just be yourself, added Xenos.
It requires self analysis, changing oneself by fixing the issues under one’s control and accepting the things one can’t easily change.
Willingness to defy.
Self-confidence, for me, is someone who is willing to defy me, says Nathaniel Elder, another quora contributor.
Read also: 6 Ways to Develop True Confidence
I’m not saying that they say “no” to me all the time. But assuming we’re in a good relationship, the ability to say “no” shows to me that that person has great self-confidence, because they aren’t seeking my validation at that moment.
According to him, one who does that shows great independent spirit. Because, it takes a lot more effort to say no to someone you’re on good terms with.
More insightful mentions on Quora:
- When you don’t bully those weaker than you and aren’t intimidated by those stronger than you.
- When you earn money, but without compromising on your morals.
- Looking someone in the eye when talking. Without fear.
- Hold the door open for women without fearing looking stupid.
- Willingness to make mistakes.
- Being firm on your point but even considering other’s point of view.
Read also: Single or Married. A Study Reveals The Most Fulfilling Life
Is any of these NON-PROFESSIONAL OPINIONS in any way against your definition of a confident man? Please, let’s know your thoughts via the comment section.
FURTHER READINGS Shakti Lamba, et al: Self-Deceived Individuals Are Better at Deceiving Others. http://dx.doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0104562 Christian A. Vaccaro, et al; Managing Emotional Manhood: Fighting and Fostering Fear in Mixed Martial Arts Danu Anthony Stinson, et al: Rewriting the Self-Fulfilling Prophecy of Social Rejection - published in Psychological science Pablo Briñol, et al: Body posture effects on self-evaluation: A self-validation approach. Published on 25 Feb, 2009 on European Journal of Social Psychology
