With Victim Mentality, you feel like a victim in any scenario, it is always very difficult to get out of that condition because you have programmed your mind not to accept that you can walk out of that situation so you end up getting stuck in it. It is usually very depressing being around someone that is always negative minded in everything they do.
Someone with a victim mentality and negativity bias usually finds things wrong with their life or feel that they do not deserve the good things in life. Thus, their life goes nowhere.
This is because no matter how much hope you give to them; they always have a way to let you see how miserable they are by bringing more complications to the hope you have offered them. If you or someone you know believes you may be suffering from a victim mentality, here are 10 signs to watch out for.
Victim Mentality Makes You Give up easily:
Have you ever wanted to do something and even before you started, you were already convinced in your mind that you will not be able to get that job done?
Well, that is a sign that you are suffering from the victim mentality, you find every possible reason to run away from any action because you believe that you cannot make it work, so you come up with different kinds of excuses thereby giving up even before you started. Because of your faithlessness in what you are supposed to do, you run away from doing those things because to you it is a total waste of effort trying to do something that you already know will not work. Sometimes when you even try to do something,
at the slightest sight of a difficulty, you drop the job or whatever it is you are trying to do and look the other way.
You lack self-confidence:
Your mind is filled with ideas but the thoughts in your head keeps telling you that you are not man enough to bring to reality those ideas in
And you believe so much in that thought of deceit in your head and because you do not believe in yourself, you do not follow up through your ideas, you even refuse to share it with someone else because you are avoiding being told that the idea sucks. You do everything you can to avoid anything that will make you take responsibility, you put things and ideas off, you always find escape routes out of issues instead of solutions and when you have to stand up for your right, you rather bend and follow the crowd than stand by the truth.
You give others control over you:
You are always shy or afraid to say things and stand by the things you say, you let other people define how you should live your life, they define the type of company you should keep, who you should talk to and who not to talk to, you give them total control over your life because you feel they know you more than you know yourself. By so doing, you become a follower for life and you lose control over your life because it is filled with orders and directives from other people.
If you put your life in the hands of others, you have no control over your life. You do not take responsibility for your actions but rather blame others when things go wrong.
You are always negative in your thoughts:
There is no time that you have the feeling of positivity in your life, every moment you are feeling that something negative is about to happen to you, you give up on life based on your inner critic. The inner critic which is supposed to help you make the right choices in your case makes you run away.
You are comfortable with things the way in your life because you do not believe that things can get better in your life and thus you settle for things in life which support how you see yourself, not feeling good enough.
You reduce yourself to nothing:
You are always trying to please everyone that you come across, you do not mind if it means displeasing yourself you would rather displease
yourself than displease another person. You do this to the point that you are reduced to nothing and people do not see your value anymore at that point you need to be rescued because you are no more functioning for yourself since you have lost your self-worth. When you have hit this bottom rock, you begin to blame everyone for not looking out for you after all you did for them forgetting that you were busy trying to meet the needs of others and forgot to meet yours too.
You feel bitter and resentful:
The major reason that has made you stop living life for yourself and start living for others is the fear of being alone so because of this, you give to everyone so that you might have friends, now, you are not even there for yourself and neither are the people you sacrificed so much for, you now end up bitter and resentful at life, you feel lost and not being in control. You felt good while pleasing other people, you derived happiness from that instead of creating your happiness.
Now you feel that the whole world has turned against you not knowing that you turned against yourself in the first place for not living your life.
You always make excuses for giving up:
You never lack excuses to give to justify your reason for giving up on things very easily, even before starting, you already have reasons why that thing will not work thereby sabotaging your chances because you do not want to put yourself out there to go for what you want and risk failure. You are afraid of being rejected or seen as a failure, you avoid the feelings of thinking that you are not good enough and end up feeling worse when you finally realize that you could never get to where you wanted in life because you gave up when you should have worked harder.
You partake in behaviours that will destroy you:
When these feelings become very serious on you, you begin to seek instant relief because you are not happy with the way you are feeling about yourself, depression creeps in and you begin to attempt to feel better by engaging in addictions, affairs and other self-destroying attitudes.
You begin to do drugs, engage in illicit sex affairs, alcoholism and may other things that can destroy you thinking that they are going to help you. You eventually end up destroying yourself and ruining your life by trying to run away from these unwanted feelings.
With Victim Mentality, You self-punish yourself:
Because of the pain and troubles that you have inflicted on yourself, you begin to attack yourself with self-blame and also lash out to anyone that comes across your way, you automatically become a damaged soul, you punish yourself and criticize yourself for allowing things to go wrong. You become a victim of self-sabotage and ruining your life.
Nothing seems to interest you anymore in life because you are angry at everyone and also at the world without realizing that you are the architect of your problems. You shut yourself up off from the world calling it a cruel world.
You blame the world for your misfortunes:
A victim of mentality will always pass the blame of his lack of self-responsibility on people when things go wrong because instead of focusing more on your life, you focused on making others happy and ended up ignoring your life. While everyone is building their life, you were helping them build theirs and forget yours. When things go sour and everything crumbles, you begin to blame it on the world and seeing people as wicked and cruel. Not knowing that you bewitched yourself.